Life Happens, How You Experience Life is a Choice

Blog Life For or To You

Life happens.

Good stuff. Painful stuff. Tragic stuff. Traumatic stuff. Scary stuff. Sweet stuff. Fun stuff.

We have some control over what happens.

And a lot of stuff just happens.

Would you agree?

Because if we agree that life happens whether we like it or not, and we can't control a lot of what happens, we have a choice on the perspective we take on the experience of life.

Ya know, the one that doesn't always make sense and is filled with suffering and unexplainable tragedy.

>>> We can see ourselves as victims of life. That life is happening TO us.

>>> Or we can look at it as happening FOR us.

People get activated when I say that life is happening FOR us.

Maybe they think that I mean they or others deserve bad things. Or that I'm dismissing the pain of their lived experiences. Or that I'm talking about just having a positive attitude. Or they don't want to look at the higher purpose or meaning of the horrific things that happen. Or they simply disagree.

[I acknowledge that I don't know everyone's experiences, and it's possible that there could be things that could be so painful that I come to reject this idea.]


This isn't really about being right or wrong. Or to argue whether horrific things should happen.

It's an invitation to shift how we EXPERIENCE life.

When we look through the lens that life is happening FOR us, not TO us, we open up to new possibilities.

We mine for blessings that paradoxically can co-exist with tragedy.

When we're IN IT, we may not be able to see from this vantage point. But in retrospect, it may become available to us.

Some people have experienced unimaginable challenges and look back and see that, during that time, they experienced deep and lasting connections with people. Or learned powerful lessons.

It's not that they WANTED it to happen.

It's not necessarily that they're GRATEFUL for it.

It doesn't let the perpetrator off the hook.

It's that they made the best of a bad situation.

They allowed themselves to extract something from it.

They allowed themselves to EXPERIENCE this bit of LIFE.

To be shaped by it.

To learn and grow from it.

To be touched by it.

When we live from this perspective...

We stop fighting life.

We stop resisting life.

And we allow life to happen (because it will, like it or not)

We rise above our own judgment of good/bad, right/wrong, and other labels, and we begin to accept that which we have little to no control over.

We get to choose...

...what do YOU choose?

(I invite you to consider the possibility that this is excellent mental hygiene and stress management…)


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