Happy Women's Day: Let's Connect on a Deeper Level
I have the absolute pleasure and honor to have built a business that has me walking beside so many amazing women, guiding them on their journey home to themselves, The Whole Soul Way™. They never cease to amaze me with their vulnerability, authenticity, self-awareness and courage.
I was bullied as a teenager and had some emotionally devastating losses in the female friendship department over the first 2 decades of my life. The list is long of ways that I internalized a message that women are a little scary and that I couldn't fully trust them.
That was my wounding. But the reason that I had experiences like these were because of their wounding.
Fortunately, I've had the privilege of seeing into the hearts of women, beneath their defense mechanisms and masks, and to experience the depth of their love, the needs of their inner child, the ache of their wounded parts, the longing to feel worthy, their desire to make a difference, their relentless commitment to their family, and so much more stunning beauty.
Women no longer scare me and I have come to trust women's hearts.
Today is a day to honor women, but I would suggest that instead of making this a today thing, make it an every day thing.
Let's practice connecting with one another at a deeper level.
What's become clear to me is that, what women want the most - from women and men - is for you to see that underneath that supermom, the one who seems to have it all together, the one who gives and gives even when her own cup is empty....is a wounded little girl who wants to be loved, seen, valued, appreciated. Who doesn't want to do it all, all the time. That needs help, even when she doesn't know how to ask.
That underneath the venting, gossiping, and criticizing is our best attempt to know ourselves and others better, feeling our deep inferiority, processing the ways we disappoint ourselves. There is a wounded little girl inside of us that wants to connect with other women and this is her best attempt at fitting in and feeling like she is with her "people". But this wounded inner child longs for so much more.
That underneath our angry outbursts, our quick to fix and give advice, our snarky comments, our pouting or tears, the ways we escape and numb out...is a wounded little girl who feels sacred and is guarding her heart from being hurt.
So let's cut each other a lot of slack. Let's remember to not take things too personally because most likely that other person's behavior is more about how they feel, what they are afraid of and what they need, and very little about you.
Maybe you can ask her "tell me how your heart feels" and you may find that's the first time anyone has ever asked her that. She may even get tears in her eyes. That's the magic my friends. That's how we touch one another deeply.
I've come to see that deep down, we want to tap into our heart more, to feel more, to remove the barriers to love, but we don't really know how. So we feel mad at others for not helping us to get there. We're mad that they're listening to the content of what we say and responding to our defensiveness and benefiting from the ways we hustle for our worth...but never hearing the pain, feelings and fears underneath it all.
Let's provide more space for THAT. Let's see if we can listen to what she's feeling at a deeper level.
Women are craving to be seen, to be held, to be FELT, to be understood, but the only way that will happen is if others stop believing their mask and armor. And start getting curious what's underneath the mask, underneath the armor.
And bravely risk getting to know her interior life.
That's my invitation on this beautiful celebrate women day
If you want to learn more about The Whole Soul Way™, let's chat. Schedule some time with me here.
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