Inside My Journal
Self-Love is a Way of Being, Not Another Thing To Do
It's so easy to neglect self-care because we have too much to do. We KNOW that if we were to take care of ourselves, everything else would be easier and better, but we just can't do it (for a myriad of reasons hidden behind "I don't have the time"). Nevertheless, I recommend we look at it differently.
What if Self-Love is more of how we "be" in the world and the tiny little choices we make all day, rather than "another thing to do on your list?"
What if it's the way we act all day long - can …
The Void Left When My Son Went To College
The house feels different, dinners feel different. It’s not exactly a “missing him” feeling. It’s more like something feels off.
It feels right in many ways. The 18 years of nurturing and preparing, his launch into the world is predictable, bittersweet. It’s developmentally spot on. It’s that time. It’s a pretty “normal thing to do.”
That he’s happy and adjusting well makes it easier, but the absence is ever present. It’s palpable. The way that his absence has left a void, an emptiness. Not…
If You're Blaming Him For Your Unhappiness, You're Not Ready to Leave
Note: This message isn’t for anyone in an abusive or toxic marriage. Your safety and health are most important.
In 2010, my marriage was falling apart.
It totally seemed easier to give up.
The idea of focusing on making our marriage better seemed daunting and, sad to say … hopeless. In my mind, I created a fantasy life where I lived with my kids in a cute apartment living a “free” life. I tapped into this fantasy whenever things were particularly crappy and I needed to feel a sense of contr…
An Important Tip to Become a Better Listener
I saw this on Facebook today: "Normalize not sharing a relatable story about yourself when someone shares something about themselves, and just listen."
Is Being Busy a Way To Avoid Living Intentionally?
It seems like there's a lot more to do these days – more email to check, more Jones' to keep up with, more events to attend, more activities to schedule.
But also, like being busy is something to be proud of.
And if you're not busy, people think there must be something wrong with you.
And yet, I think there's something more to this.
Have we decided that we're only valuable if we're busy and productive?
Maybe it doesn’t even matter WHAT we're doing, as long as we're always doin…
Rage, Who Are You?
A poem from my journal on June 14, 2018
I am the voice that screams from within
Aching to be heard, not to be dimmed
I see the pain that was told to hide
Longing for a voice, rumbling inside
I tried to stop him from hurting you
But fear wouldn't allow me to
I'm the tiger that roars a ferocious "no"
Clawing and growling, stop, please go!
I'm the mama bear who protects her young
Staying close and alert, so no harm can be done
In the face of violation, I was born
But I was n…
How I Moved Beyond My Fear of Criticism
How do you feel about criticism? Do you do everything you can do avoid it? Does your fear of criticism hold you back from being your true self?
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” ~Dr. Seuss
For as long as I can remember, I lived in my own make-believe world where I believed that if I was “perfect” in my actions, no one would criticize me. I was convinced that I was doing everything “right” therefore I was protected. …
Self-Care Is NOT Enough
Most moms have been told “take care of yourself”. Self-care has become pretty mainstream.
But I see a lot of moms stuck at self-care when their soul is asking for self-love.
Seriously, I highly recommend self-care. I recommend that we all get 7–8 hours of sleep at night, and if we have new babies, that we sleep during the day when they sleep. We need to move our bodies, eat reasonably healthfully, and take time to do nurturing things that refresh and rejuvenate us. You may choose to meditate, …
Self-Love Includes Loving the Parts You Fear are Unlovable
Maybe you've heard people talking about self-love as if it’s just “this thing” you should just do or have.
But I want to be completely honest with you
Self-love is not an easy journey and can feel uncomfortable
Tremendous rewards, but hard work nonetheless.
We don’t get taught how to love ourselves. In fact, most of us get taught how to reject and criticize ourselves, to beat ourselves up, through subtle and not-so-subtle cues throughout childhood and beyond.
Self-love is not just “girl, yo…
Do You Think of Yourself as Spiritual?
Let's talk spirituality and how it connects to YOU and the world.
Is spirituality the same as religion?
I notice there are some who have a pretty strong emotional reaction to the word spirituality because they associate it with organized religion. Many people have a positive response. Many people have a negative response. While “religion” is certainly one way to define spirituality, it feels a bit limiting to me.
I notice others who respond strongly because they hear spirituality as…
- Authenticity (18)
- Change the World (11)
- Communications (5)
- Conscious Living (30)
- Empowerment (20)
- From Deb's Journal (4)
- Inner Work (28)
- Leadership (5)
- Mindfulness (14)
- Parenting (13)
- Relationships (14)
- Self-Love (28)
- Shadow Integration (5)
- Videos (4)
- Worthiness (9)
- Aging (1)
- Nervous System Regulation (1)
- Parent with Dementia (1)
- Parent Yourself (1)